How to Greet a Minister After Church Services
Should You Compliment, Critique, Compare or Complain Following a Service?
Some people just have a knack for social situations, and some don’t. If you are shy, inexperienced or insecure about approaching a minister in the receiving line after church services, here are some tips to consider.
Do Shake Hands or Hug, But Don’t Overdo the Flattery
Ministers are typically greeted by dozens, sometimes hundreds, of congregants after services, and they often deliver more than one sermon or message per day.
For example, Reverend Dian Williams, associate minister at Unity Church of Christianity in Houston, Texas, says people who come through the line and flatter her with remarks about her necklace or her dress seem to be avoiding any mention of her sermon and must feel that it was lacking in some way.
A warm handshake or hug helps to convey sincerity, but appropriate comments about the sermon itself are much more important than flattery.
Do Share Your Experience, But Don’t Hold Up the Line
Most ministers are happy to listen to your experience with the topic of the sermon, but remember that yours is one of many and that there are people patiently waiting behind you.
Instead, say something simple such as, “I could really relate to you today, I’ve been in a similar situation myself.”
If you feel that it is vital that the minister hear your story at length, make an appointment or ask for some extra time afterwards to compare notes. Don’t monopolize the flow of the reception line. Your fellow congregants will thank you.
Do Comment on the Sermon Message, But Don’t Offer “Suggestions”
It’s likely that your minister spent several hours preparing just the right content for the message or lesson. A sincere minister will have spent additional time in prayer and meditation, asking for guidance from God about the presentation.
So it’s definitely appropriate to mention any specific thought, concept or analogy that touched your spirit.
But avoid offering any suggestions for a different or “better” approach while you are in the receiving line.
Your minister might appreciate your critique, but do it in a more appropriate setting, such as in a phone call or e-mail.
Do Speak Sincerely, But Don’t Try to Fake It
According to Reverend Williams, there are some who will come through the reception line with statements such as “that’s the best sermon I’ve ever heard in my life,” week after week after week.
Oddly enough, these often turn out to be the same people who will then complain to church officers about the minister’s theology or presentation or appearance or personality. If you can’t behave in a genuine and honest manner with a certain minister, avoid the reception line altogether rather than pretending to have enjoyed the sermon.
If you discover that the minister has completely strayed from the teaching or theology of the church, contact the church office to discuss your concerns. Speak sincerely to them rather than insincerely to the minister.
A genuine handshake or hug, along with a brief statement of how you related to the sermon or how you can apply the message to your life, is a wonderful and appropriate show of gratitude and support for your minister. Remember to save your critiques, complaints or suggestions for improvement for another time and place.
Greeting Your Minister After Church
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