The Book of Common Prayer, Episcopal Church USA defines prayer as "responding to God, by thought and by deeds, with or without words." In other words, prayer means having a relationship with God, even if you don't say anything at all.
What is Prayer?
In a healthy relationship, two individuals share a level of trust. They are open with each other and respect each others' needs, even if it conflicts with one person's desires. They can talk excitedly or rest together, saying nothing. This level of deep trust is what the Book of Common Prayer holds up as the ideal relationship between a person and God. Developing this kind of relationship, however, takes time and dedication.
What is Thanksgiving?
"Thanksgiving is offered to God for all the blessings of this life, for our redemption, and for whatever draws us closer to God, " according to the Book of Common Prayer. Giving thanks to God means letting God know that you notice your blessings and God's presence in your life.
How to Be Thankful
A simple table grace exemplifies an easy way to notice your blessings.
"God is great. God is good. Let us thank him for our food. Amen."
The prayer thanks God for what is right in front of the speaker- a warm, hot dinner.
What is right in front of you in your life that is going well or a source of joy? A completed project at work? A new baby? Noticing what is going well right now and sharing that with God is key to giving thanks in small ways every day.
Like any habit, noticing blessings and giving thanks takes time and intentionality. Try including thanksgivings in daily prayer, and include as many thanksgivings as petitions. Most people let God know what's going wrong in their lives, not what's going right. Indeed, it is human nature to dwell on the negative; however, the mind can overcome this tendency and choose to dwell in more cheerful places. Over time, giving thanks will become as natural as saying, "God, help."
Seek the Positive in Life
Prayers of thanksgiving are connected with seeking the positive in life and seeing God as good. Choosing to live life as though it is good, even when life does not feel good, is key to giving thanks. For example, a person seeking reasons to give thanks will be looking for blessings in their day, giving them a positive outlook on even the worst days.
Even in the darkest times of life, there are still blessings and reasons to give thanks. Everyone struggles and suffers at times in the ditches of life. The person who searches for reasons to be thankful has an advantage, as their smile can brighten their ditches and even the ditches of others. The person who dwells in darkness, or negative thoughts and frustrations, however, is only digging that ditch of suffering deeper and deeper.
Giving thanks does not mean that uncomfortable feelings or events should be avoided or ignored in the quest for the positive. Indeed, there is a time to grieve and scream at God for blessings taken away, and that time should not be avoided. Just as any healthy relationship invites openness and being real, so does a healthy relationship with God.
Sometimes, life is too much, giving thanks is not possible, and in those times the support of others is vital to connect the suffering person with a good God who has become lost in the darkness of life. Knowing when one cannot give thanks is just as important as knowing when one can give thanks, and walking that fine line is a life-long struggle.
Choosing to dwell in positive places and giving thanks for God's blessings is but one prayer tool in building a trusting relationship with God, as is, indeed, the hope and purpose of all prayer.
See Prayers of Intercession for the second article in a series on prayer.
"Catechism" of Book of Common Prayer, Episcopal Church USA. Church Publishing Corporation. 1979.
 |
